An Unchanging God, Individualized Grace

The Lord is going to give us exactly what we need if we're willing to accept it.

October 27-November 2

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An Unchanging God, Individualized Grace 

In August of 1840, Joseph Smith delivered a sermon that introduced the concept of baptisms for the dead. People rejoiced and began being baptized for their kindred dead shortly thereafter. The Mississippi River was often the choice of setting for these sacred ordinances.

In January of 1841, Joseph Smith received Doctrine and Covenants 124 along with this instruction.

Doctrine and Covenants 124:31 But I command you, all ye my saints, to build a house unto me; and I grant unto you a sufficient time to build a house unto me; and during this time your baptisms shall be acceptable unto me. 

The Lord commanded the Saints to build a temple again, and He told them that He would give them sufficient time to do so. Until then, He would accept their baptisms for the dead that occurred in the river. 

We’ve talked about the fact that the Lord tailors His commandments for His people. For example, He made the Word of Wisdom advice before He ever made it a commandment or requirement for the temple. In this case, He allowed the Saints to give their best effort in preparing the temple but allowed them to still offer salvation to their loved ones in the meantime. The willingness exhibited by the Lord to work with us is always a gift.

And yet, in other examples, He seems unrelenting in what He demands of His Saints. For example, some of the trials the Saints went through leading up to Nauvoo are difficult to read about, let alone endure. He required a beautiful, massive temple from people who were poverty-stricken and inexperienced. He sent fathers out on missions while their families struggled at home.

At times, He stands ready to accept their best efforts. At other times, they are chastised for not fulfilling commandments to the letter. Some may see this as variability in personality. Some may see an arbitrary God who demands or allows depending on His mood. 

I see a God who eternally loves us and makes decisions based on His purposes for us: to turn us into little versions of Him so that we can enjoy what He enjoys. 

This is why He can simultaneously overthrow moneychangers in a temple but speak gently to an adulterer. It’s why He can strike Uzziah but forgive a Canaanite prostitute named Rahab. These decisions aren’t based on His ever-changing moods. They’re based on individuals who actually need wildly different things. And even within those individuals, their needs are going to vary from day to day. 

There is a philosophy adopted by humans that we need to treat all of our children the same. I understand that consistency is vital to a child, but maybe we’re being consistent in the wrong things. I have tried to approach parenting a little differently. Rather than being consistent across the board with each child, trying to remember how I handled any given situation so that I can do the same thing for a sibling, I am consistent in my love for each child.

And because I am consistent in my love for each child, my reactions and decisions are going to vary by child.

At any given moment, does my child need me to meet them where they’re at or hold to a high standard? What is going to help them progress depending on how they slept, whether they’re hungry, whether they’re stressed from sitting at school all day? Do they need connection and mercy or connection and discipline? Which will help them see reality more accurately and help them acquire correct attitudes towards that reality?

I am not Heavenly Mother (or Father) and so unfortunately (or fortunately) for my children, sometimes my decisions ARE based off of my mood and limited capacities for wisdom and patience as much as I try to center them on each individual child.

But not so with the Lord. 

He stands ready with infinite wisdom and patience in guiding us along. If He seems impatient or demanding, perhaps it is us who need to reframe our perspective. He is not annoyed with us; He isn’t ready to wash His hands of us (even when we wash our hands of Him). Rather, He is making individualized decisions about what to require and how to meet us where we’re at. He is parenting and coaching and coaxing in the most divine way possible. 

If He seems cross or unrelenting, it is likely because He knows that pushing us to a higher standard is what we need. It’s going to require more of our souls. It’s going to push us to the point where we need Him; or more accurately, it will push us to the point where we recognize how much we need Him.

If He is gentle and accepting, it is likely because that is the approach that is going to help us progress faster in that moment. 

The Saints had just experienced some intense devastation. They had been harmed cruelly. They had sacrificed so much. That sacrifice and difficulty wasn’t necessarily over, but Nauvoo became a period of rest for the Saints. The Lord knows what He’s doing. He knows that difficulty is why we came here; He knows the divine purpose of opposition. And yet, He’s also wise enough to know that we’re not ready for constant opposition. Moments of quiet and peace can balance all of that out and help bring out the best in us.

So here we see the Lord meeting His Saints where they’re at. He rejoices in the excitement of their hearts to perform this work. He loves their eagerness to provide saving ordinances for their kindred dead. That doesn’t mean He let go of the standard; baptisms for the dead belong to the temple. But He was also willing to give them stepping stones towards that standard.

He is not a changing Lord, making decisions based on whether He slept good last night or whether He’s hungry. He is a perfect Lord who knows whether His Saints need a stepping stone or chastisement. 

I testify of a Lord who loves us and makes decisions based on each individual. I testify that even in the most tragic circumstances, He is there ready to carry us and give us the hope we need to be resilient. I testify of a Lord who loves us enough to whip us into shape or meet us where we’re at, depending on what is going to help us progress into our best selves. He is infinitely good, wise, and patient, but He is not afraid to push us. I love Him, and I’m grateful for how He has pushed me.

4 thoughts on “An Unchanging God, Individualized Grace

  1. Yes, the Lord, and His Father and ours, are unchanging — the same yesterday, today and forever!!

    Their love and relentless pursuit of us are unfailing. We can give up on our children and they can give up on us and the restored gospel, but they will never give up on us!! They will definitely meet us where we are at. I love how you said that!!

    It was 280 miles or so, from upstate New York to Kirtland. 800+ miles from Kirtland to Independence, MO and over 1000 miles from Missouri to SLC. The Lord expects us to be on the move when He needs us to be as well as loving, serving and building up His kingdom, as well as His Temples — so He can bless us, when we are not in travel mode. He also gives us time and grace to arrive while blessing us on our way.

    There were miracles and tender mercies from beginning to end and since God loves us just as much as He loved the early Saints, we can also expect miracles and tender mercies. Since there is space in-between, we are always in the middle of our next miracle, just like they were.

    I love your thoughts on an individualized plan of training, stretching and growing for ALL of our Heavenly Father’s children.

    I am very grateful for these wise words today.

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    • Hahah I have to be honest. I keep waiting for you to tell me that I’ve shared everything I could possibly share and that it’s time to move on. I won’t resent you when that day comes! Sometimes I feel like I don’t have anything new to share, and I worry that it gets old and repetitive.

      Anyway, grateful for your comments and testimony. Yesterday, I was also thinking about how the Saints had to keep starting over and over and over. A lot of the time, they wouldn’t even finish what they started before they had to start again. It’s probably because it’s not about finishing; there is merit in the work itself. There is merit in starting over again and again. Traveling and moving is so necessary!

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      • Telling you I’ve heard enough would be like telling Handel he’s written enough music or President Oaks he’s given enough talks! 😉

        There many, many versions of a story that someone at the US Patent Office (possibly a clerk or Commissioner?) sometime in the 1800’s, felt the office should be closed because “everything possible had been invented” and so he had decided to resign before being forced to by reason of the closing of the office.

        It’s been 5+ years – twice through each of the standard works & then some. Your approach is still fresh & insightful as ever.  Keep your “office” open.

        I’m sure you know how much I enjoy finding Divine Correlation everywhere. Although we don’t know when he arrived, the boy in John 6:9 brought food. He could have saved his food the entire time or missed 98% of what was taught over those many hours, or days. Either way, 5000 men + women & children were fed because 1 boy brought a few loaves & fish with him to hear Jesus speak. Your loaves & fish are healthy & very worthy of being multiplied every week.

        I prefer your written posts over videos only because I can read faster than I can listen & take notes. This is the result of 30 years of being a government employee & no reflection on anything you’ve produced.

        A conversation w your husband, worry, a walk in the park with your daughter, a conference talk about resilient trust captures your attention and leads to one of my all-time favorite videos. Only a knucklehead would ever suggest that process should stop.

        If there was a Come Follow Me Video Hall of Fame, Covid 19 & the Jaredites (which I watched again today) would get in on the 1st ballot! Keep teaching from on high, singing praises & having light continually. I thank you for commending yourself to the Lord.

        Keep the office open. Stay amazing & inspiring my friend.

        PS: If I ever fail to consistently respond to your uplifting & inspiring messages, please check the obituaries! LoL

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      • Hah that’s a fantastic story. I’ve never heard it before. And thank you for all of the encouragement. I needed it today. I also understand what you mean about reading. I hardly pick up any information when I’m listening to something. I just don’t process it as well. Reading has always been able to give me the most. That being said…sometimes I think my message gets a tad more refined in the videos because it gives me an opportunity to go over it again. But if you’re happy I’m definitely happy!

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